I am growing out of my pregnancy shirts. AHHHHH. I have officially retired two of them now (very sad that they happen to be my short sleeved ones). To accompany my ever growing stomach I woke up today with... MORE STRETCH MARKS?!?!?!? ughhh I didn't think there was anywhere left to get them. I look like a zebra. I have decided that I am done, to bad the baby isn't ready yet.

Lizzy has officially decided her favorite hairstyle is braids. Every morning when she gets dressed I ask her how she wants her hair. She always reply's braids. I think it is because it is the only way that all her hair stays out of her eyes all day. She is so good about getting her hair done. She doesn't like it brushed but she deals with it.

Sam is still teething. He has been teething since april I think. He gets his teeth in the funniest oder too. He has 3 in the bottom on the fron and 3 mollers. He is working on the 4th moller, with no sign of the other bottom front one.

Trevor is studying for more of his insurance licenses. He is suppose to take the test for another one next week out in the big T.O.

Verdict

So we met with the specialist today. With a 10-15% chance that Me, the Baby or both of us could die we have decided to stick with the c-section instead of trying the vbac. Just isn't worth the risk to me. So September 4th is still the big day, and the countdown is on.

Hey Mom...

Take a picture of ME!!!

(stall tactic for bed)

Tada

As promised here are more pictures of Sam's buzz



He is such a funny little man. Always a character. He will grab your face between his hands and give you the biggest wettest sloppiest kisses, then he laughs and runs away. He gives big hugs to Lizzy and they both end up on the floor laughing. When you call him over he runs to you, well almost to you. He stays just outside of your arm reach and then takes off the other way. Gotta love this little man. He is SUCH a BOY.

Lizzy got to go on a date with Mumma, Papa and Gram on Saturday. We headed up to the Calgary Farmers Market. It was so much fun. I LOVE farmers markets. I bought big crates of blueberries and froze them so that we will have them for the next few months. Lizzy had a great time though, She got a pink cuppy cake


And a baloon Lady bug. She was so excited while the man was making it she was jumping up and down and clapping her hands.

Papa spoils her.

The blue screen of DEATH

My desktop has officially given up the ghost. I have gotten the blue screen of death twice now. So I am back to the laptop (which I struggle with). So chances are good pictures will be scarce unless I take the time to figure it all out.

Lizzy is stopping her naps. Kid won'e sleep at night now. So my 3 hour siesta in the middle of the day is gone. She is napping now, but life was a tragedy today and I am short tempered (lack of sleep).

Samuel is a turkey as usual. I love him. He is so cute.

I have an appointment with a specialist next week to talk about the vbac and see what all the risks are, find out if it is really something I want to try. My head is screaming at me "ARE YOU CRAZY? Do you have any idea how painful that would be, let alone what happens". I think it is the best option for my kids though. With Trev gone and a new baby and me out of comminssion, I think they would have breakdowns. I am just trying not to think about it. If it was a truly slefish decision then c-section all the way, I just am having a hard time with 6 weeks of no lifting and how many weeks of walking like a granny. We will see. So I need to compile a list of questions for the dr. If you think of any leave them because I want to make sure I ask her EVERYTHING.

hmmm

So I saw my Dr. today.

The hospital I am at (and took me months to get in at) is a low risk hospital. If I choose a vbac I would have to go back to the city hospital instead (boo). All well and fine though in the long run, does it really matter.

Anyways after talking to him and doing some reading I am a little afraid of the decision. I would really rather try the VBAC. I think it would be better for my kids and easier on me. However the risks are so great. I only have 20 months between my first 2 sections and there will only be 18 months between Sam and this one. Also add in my appendectomy I had last may. My risk is pretty high.

I am thinking of seeing if I can get in with my Dr. here in the city to see what she thinks about it and calling a LD nurse I know.

The thing I really needd to keep in mind either way is that the whole goal of this is to go home with a healthy baby and a healthy mom. In the end it doesn't matter how.

Opinions.

This is my disclaimer. I will make up my own mind.

Now here is the question on which I would like some input. VBAC. I have been thinking a lot about it recently. Not because I have a problem with C-sections. My first one was great my second one was fine.

Here are the reasons I am thinking of changing my mind though.

Recovery - It is a much faster recovery the natural way. I will have 3 kids and I am a little panicked about how I will take care of them all especially when Trevor will be gone so much. My Mom is 4 minutes away but still, can I really put that much on her (AGAIN) that for 2-3 weeks she has to take care of all 4 of us.

Moving - This is all related to recovery I guess, but if I feel better and can get back on my feet quicker then moving cross country will be that much easier. Really not a big thing because I will have months before I move but it is all kind of connected.

The drugs - the morphine messes me up.

Reasons to stick with the plan and do the C-Section.

I know what I am in for- I am not a person who likes change. I like to have things the same. I don't like change. I know what my day will be like I know what to expect.

I know when and where and how long - there is somthing about knowing the day, the time, and that it will take 15 minutes.

The fear - The worst part of the c-section for me is the needles (epidural and IV) so I know that that is the worst part. the worst fear of the day, the worst pain, I know that it is it. I am a WIMP. I don't think my body can deal with ... yeh ... that. I am afraid of how much it will hirt and how scary it all is, and I am afraid to have to go through all that and that there is still a chance I could end up on the operating table and have the C-section anyways. why not just skip the middle and go to the end.

Anyways there it all is. I am going to see if I can get in with my Dr. this week to talk about it. And I hate to say it but even if you all thing I should attempt the VBAC I quite possibly will just do the c-section anyways. I just really wanted to know what you all think.

And if there is anyone out there who has done it... opinions please

The buzz

Sam had his first buzz cut. The after pictures are a little blurry so I will take some and post them tomorrow.




He looks so cute and grown up, I LOVE it.


The BIG buzz though is all about this.


And this... (the child free trip picture from my photo update earlier this week)


For our trip we went to Sarnia, it is like Narnia but Sarnia. (Trevor slipped up and called Narnia a few times while we were there.) Trevor interviewed with State Farm in June to take over an agency out there when another man retires. They liked him so much that they flew the two of us out there for a few days to see the city and do an in person interview.

Sarnia is in the very southern part of Ontario. It is a border city on the very southern tip of Lake Huron where it feeds into the St. Clair river. It is about the size of Lethbridge.

He nailed the interview and every thing was put into motion. Up until now we have been waiting on banking and for them to process everything officially. As it stands Trevor should start into the training program the week after the baby is born (I was hoping for August) and he should start out in Ontario in January/February. I am free to move out there whenever I feel like it. It will be a matter of how badly I miss Trev in our long spurts while he is gone and how much I don't want to move again. My plan is to stay in Calgary until Trev is in Sarnia full time. I figure if I have to spend time alone I might as well be around my family but I would see him more if I moved out there.

While we were out there we met the Bishop and a bunch of people from the ward and toured around. We really like it. It would be different than anywhere we have lived before but it has a really family oriented feeling about it, and we think we could do well out there.

The St. Clair River and Lake Huron


The bridge to Michigan



There it is the new adventure.

The call

I just got a phone call from the High River Hospital *I didn't like the Rocky View. I blame it on to many patients and to little space/staff* I am a patient of the low risk clinic out there and of a Dr named Dr. Smillie :) . The call was from the booking lady. She had just received the form from my Dr. giving her the dates for my C-Section. She only had one space left in the 4 day range. So we are booked to have Abigail on September 4th 2009 at 8:15am. I was hoping for a week earlier than that but my Dr turned me down.

I am funny about my hospital stays. Last year (yes last year) when we had Sam Trevor went to school in the afternoon after my surgery. People got mad at him for leaving me. I told him to go. I am so doped up from the drugs, and after 38ish weeks of not sleeping through the night, all I want to do is sleep. I feel bad because people will come visit and I am so out of it. I figure I might as well take the time when the baby is with the nurses to sleep as much as I can before it is me that is up with her.

So there we go 52 days and counting.

FHE and Eating Habits

So for family home evening we sang songs. Lizzy would say "How about this one" and I would reply "which one" Then she would get the 3 year old thinking face. Eyes back and forward looking towards the roof, mouth scrunched up, thinking humm. Then she would spurt out a song, "Child of God", "incy spider", "happy know it", "popcorn". Then we would sing it and it would all repeat. I thought it was funny how she would be all excited and then have to think about what she wanted.

One the stranger side. Sam has always been my BIG eater. Ever since he was born he has ate more than I would think a child his size should. Until yesterday. Now he picks at his food, and plays with it. Even his favorites. He usually eats his breakfast but lunch and supper not really. On the other hand, Lizzy has always been a good eater, fruits veggies whatever, but she doesn't eat a whole lot. Until yesterday. She will clear her plate and ask for more and an hour later tell me she is hungry (bedtime ploy to stay up?). I think it is odd how they have completly switched eating style, my eater doesn't eat and my snacker is hungry like a wolf.